Ep. 17— Life After Cancer: The Emotional Reality of Remission and Recurrence feat. Dr. Elizabeth Kacel
EPISODE DESCRIPTION
When cancer treatment ends, many people expect life to return to normal. But for patients and families, the journey often continues in ways that aren’t always visible.
Matti is joined by clinical health psychologist Dr. Elizabeth Kacel to discuss the emotional and psychological challenges that can follow a cancer diagnosis, including uncertainty, anxiety, identity shifts, relationships, and rebuilding a sense of stability. Drawing on years of experience supporting cancer patients, Dr. Kacel offers insight into how people adapt, grow, and continue living meaningful lives after diagnosis.
This episode is dedicated in loving memory of Alayna Magnan.
About Dr. Elizabeth Kacel:
Dr. Elizabeth Kacel is a licensed clinical psychologist and the founder of PEAR Health Psychology, PLLC, cultivating Purpose, Empowerment, Acceptance, and Resilience among people facing cancer and other medical conditions. Dr. Kacel uses evidence-based psychological treatment approaches to help patients to cope effectively and live meaningfully across all phases of cancer from new diagnosis through survivorship. She has worked with individuals and families with cancer and other medical conditions for more than 15 years. She completed her PhD in clinical health psychology at the University of Florida and a postdoctoral fellowship in psychosocial oncology at the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota. She has worked in top academic health centers and hospitals, contributed to 20+ peer-reviewed journal articles, and participated in numerous local and national conferences focused on cancer psychology. Dr. Kacel is a native Chicagoan and enjoys living in the city with her husband and two cats. She is an avid traveler, nature lover, yoga practitioner, and amateur photographer.
TRANSCRIPT
Many of us remember the actor Chadwick Boseman, star of Black Panther, 42, and Marshall, among others. Like many people, I knew that Boseman had been diagnosed with cancer and tragically died from the disease in 2020. Earlier this year, though, his wife, Simone Ledward Boseman, shared something in an interview that caught my attention. Boseman was originally diagnosed in 2016 and had actually gone into remission. According to Simone, when the cancer returned, it came as a complete surprise to both of them.
When I heard that, I found myself thinking about a word we hear all the time when it comes to cancer: remission. For many of us, remission sounds like an ending—a finish line, a moment when the uncertainty is finally over. But the more I’ve learned, the more I’ve realized that remission can be something much more complicated than that. For some patients, remission isn’t just relief. It’s also follow-up scans, ongoing monitoring, fear of recurrence, and learning how to balance hope with realism.
In other words, while remission may mark the end of treatment, it doesn’t always mark the end of uncertainty. So how do patients navigate the emotional reality of remission and recurrence? Let’s talk about it.
My guest today is Dr. Elizabeth Kacel, a Chicago-based licensed clinical psychologist and founder of Pair Health Psychology. Dr. Kacel specializes in helping people facing cancer and other medical conditions cultivate purpose, empowerment, acceptance, and resilience. She has worked with individuals and families navigating cancer for more than 15 years and completed a postdoctoral fellowship in psychosocial oncology at the Mayo Clinic.
Naturally, she’s the perfect guest to discuss this topic. Dr. Elizabeth Kacel, welcome to It’s Gonna Be Fine.
Dr. Kacel: Thank you so much for having me.
What People Get Wrong About Remission
Matti:I want to start with a story. When I was a kid, another student at school had a father who was diagnosed with cancer. I remember hearing he was going to have surgery to remove the tumor, and my child brain basically thought, “Problem solved. They’ll take it out and he’ll be fine.”
Obviously, my adult brain understands things aren’t that simple. But I think it highlights a misconception a lot of people have—that treatment is the end of the story. When people hear someone has successfully completed treatment or is in remission, what do they often misunderstand about what comes next?
Dr. Kacel: There are actually a number of things about that story that are interesting. What’s funny is that your childhood reaction is almost the opposite of how many adults react to cancer. For most people, when they hear the word cancer, their minds immediately jump to mortality. It doesn’t matter whether it’s early-stage cancer, late-stage cancer, treatable, or potentially curable. The word itself carries tremendous emotional weight.
As for what happens after treatment, it depends on the type of cancer and the individual’s situation. Some patients with very early-stage cancers receive a very reassuring message from their healthcare team. They may have surgery, radiation, or chemotherapy and then be told there’s a very good chance they’ll never deal with that cancer again.
But even that messaging has changed over time. Many providers have moved away from making promises about cure or remission because we’ve learned that cancer doesn’t always follow predictable timelines. We’re seeing recurrences happen years or even decades later in some cases.
That’s one reason why the concept of remission has become more complicated.
Remission vs. No Evidence of Disease
Matti: Does remission mean the same thing as being cancer-free?
Dr. Kacel: Not necessarily.
Historically, if someone completed treatment and scans showed no visible cancer, they would often be told they were in remission. Many people came to believe that if they remained in remission for five years, they were effectively cured.
Unfortunately, we’ve learned that reality can be more complicated than that.
I recently worked with a woman whose cancer returned after 25 years. Now, I don’t share that story to scare people. It’s likely a very unusual case. But it illustrates why many healthcare providers have shifted toward a different phrase: No Evidence of Disease, or NED.
NED means that right now, based on the tools available to us, we don’t see evidence of cancer. It doesn’t mean we can guarantee there are no cancer cells anywhere in the body. It means we don’t currently see evidence of disease, and we’re going to continue monitoring.
Matti: That’s a subtle difference, but it feels important.
Dr. Kacel: It is important.
Many patients understandably feel that once treatment ends, they should be done. But for a lot of people, they’re not really done. There may be years of follow-up appointments, bloodwork, scans, and ongoing monitoring.
And emotionally, there can be a lingering question:
“What if I have to go through this again?”
Living With Ongoing Treatment
Matti: You also mentioned that some patients stay on treatment indefinitely. How does that work? Are they considered to be in remission?
Dr. Kacel: Sometimes yes, sometimes no. It depends on the type of cancer and the goals of treatment.
There are cancers where treatment can control the disease for many years without completely eliminating it. In those situations, patients may remain on medication indefinitely because stopping treatment could allow the cancer to progress.
In some ways, that’s a positive development because it means we have therapies capable of controlling diseases that previously would have progressed much more quickly.
At the same time, those treatments can be difficult to tolerate. Many people describe it as a choice that doesn’t really feel like a choice. If treatment is what’s keeping the disease under control, continuing treatment becomes part of everyday life.
That’s why the emotional side of cancer care is so important. Whether someone is in active treatment, survivorship, remission, or living with cancer as a chronic condition, there are real psychological challenges that come with navigating uncertainty.
Why Fear Doesn’t End When Treatment Ends
Matti: One thing I’m hearing throughout this conversation is that even when treatment ends successfully, uncertainty doesn’t necessarily end with it.
Dr. Kacel: Exactly.
Many people assume the hardest part of cancer is treatment itself. Treatment is certainly difficult. But for some people, the period afterward can be surprisingly challenging.
During treatment, there’s a plan. There are appointments. There are medications. There are things to do.
After treatment, there can be a lot more space for fear and uncertainty to creep in.
Questions like:
“What if it comes back?”
“What if this symptom means something?”
“How will I know if something is wrong?”
Those concerns are incredibly common, and they’re one of the reasons fear of recurrence has become such an important area of research and psychological support.
Survivorship, Mental Health, and Life After Treatment
Matti: We’ve talked about fear of recurrence, but another word I kept seeing during my research was survivorship.
At first, I wasn’t even sure what that meant. Does it apply only to patients? Does it include family members? What exactly is survivorship?
Dr. Kacel: Depending on the context, a person is considered a cancer survivor from the moment they’re diagnosed.
Historically, though, survivorship was often viewed as the phase that began after treatment ended. The thinking was essentially, “Congratulations, you’re done. Go forth and prosper.” We’ve learned it’s not that simple.
In many ways, finishing treatment is actually the beginning of a new chapter.
Cancer treatments save lives, but they can also leave lasting physical and emotional effects. Some treatments impact heart health, bone health, fertility, cognition, energy levels, and mental health. As a result, survivorship programs have grown tremendously over the last decade. The goal is no longer just helping people survive cancer. It’s helping them live well after cancer.
That means caring for the whole person—physically, emotionally, socially, and psychologically.
Matti: It sounds like survivorship isn’t just about monitoring whether cancer comes back.
Dr. Kacel: Exactly.
For example, some breast cancer treatments can increase the risk of future cardiac problems. So even after treatment ends, patients may require ongoing heart monitoring.
Years ago, people might have responded by saying, “Well, at least you’re alive.” Today, we’re recognizing that quality of life matters too. You don’t have to choose between being grateful to be alive and wanting to enjoy your life. Both things can be true.
Matti: I imagine this becomes even more complicated when someone already has another chronic condition before they’re diagnosed with cancer.
Dr. Kacel: Absolutely.
Diabetes is a great example. Certain medications commonly used during cancer treatment—particularly steroids—can significantly affect blood sugar levels.
Matti: I can personally attest to that.
Dr. Kacel: Exactly. On the other hand, treatments that cause nausea or vomiting can make it difficult to maintain consistent nutrition, which can also affect diabetes management.
Mental health conditions can be impacted as well. For example, steroids can increase the risk of manic symptoms in people who have bipolar disorder.
It’s another reminder that physical health and mental health don’t exist in separate silos. They’re deeply connected. That’s why integrated care is so important.
When Do Patients See a Psychologist?
Matti: Speaking of integrated care, when do patients typically start working with someone like you?
Are you brought in immediately after diagnosis? Or do people usually find you later?
Dr. Kacel: The answer is probably the most psychologist answer possible:
It depends.
Some people meet with a psychologist right after diagnosis and immediately find it helpful. Others decline support initially because they’re overwhelmed. They want to focus entirely on treatment and don’t feel ready to talk about what they’re experiencing emotionally.
Then there are people who don’t seek support until treatment is over.
Many patients spend months operating in survival mode. They have appointments, scans, chemotherapy sessions, radiation schedules, medications, paperwork, insurance issues—it becomes a full-time job. During that time, there often isn’t much space to process what’s happening emotionally.
Then treatment ends. The schedule suddenly opens up, and everything they’ve been carrying emotionally finally catches up with them.
That’s when many people realize they need help processing what they’ve gone through.
Matti: So sometimes treatment ending is actually when the emotional impact really hits.
Dr. Kacel: Exactly.
People expect to feel relieved. And they often do.
But relief can coexist with fear, uncertainty, grief, exhaustion, and anxiety. Those emotions frequently become more noticeable once the immediate demands of treatment are gone.
Why Psychologists Are Becoming Part of Cancer Care
Matti: Are psychologists commonly integrated into cancer centers now?
Dr. Kacel: Much more than they used to be.
In 2015, the Commission on Cancer began requiring accredited cancer centers to screen patients for distress. That includes emotional distress, physical distress, financial concerns, spiritual concerns, and other challenges that can affect a person’s well-being.
Once you’re screening for distress, you need professionals who know how to evaluate and treat it. As a result, many cancer centers now include psychologists, social workers, counselors, and other behavioral health specialists as part of the care team. Doctors can identify when someone is struggling and refer them directly.
Matti: That makes a lot of sense.
Dr. Kacel: It does.
Physical health affects mental health. Mental health affects physical health. The research supporting that connection is overwhelming.
Why Some Patients Prefer Therapy Outside the Hospital
Matti: Are there ever reasons patients choose not to see someone within the cancer center?
Dr. Kacel: Definitely.
One of the biggest reasons is privacy.
When psychologists work within a hospital system, our notes often become part of the larger medical record. Many patients appreciate that because it allows for coordinated care. Their oncologist knows how they’re doing emotionally, and I know what’s happening medically.
But some people aren’t comfortable with that. They may feel that their oncologist needs that information, but their dentist or podiatrist doesn’t.
For those patients, working with a therapist outside the healthcare system may feel more comfortable. I completely respect that choice.
The Cures Act and Reading Your Own Medical Notes
Matti: That’s interesting because I actually enjoy reading my medical notes.
I don’t mean the after-visit summary. I mean the detailed notes.
Sometimes I read them and think, “Wow, my doctor really cares.” The way they describe what I’m experiencing often feels more thoughtful and detailed than I expected.
Dr. Kacel: I’m thrilled you’ve had that experience.
Not everyone reacts that way. A lot of people are surprised by how clinical medical documentation can sound. Healthcare providers often use concise language because documentation requirements are extensive.
Sometimes patients read those notes and feel misunderstood or reduced to a few sentences. So reactions vary.
Matti: I once had a doctor warn me ahead of time.
She told me she needed to document certain things so insurance would approve a medication, but she also said, “Don’t panic if you read the note later.”
I thought that was incredibly thoughtful.
Dr. Kacel: It was.
That conversation has become more important because of the 21st Century Cures Act. The law gives patients broad access to their medical records, often including notes shortly after they’re written.
That was a major shift. For the first time, clinicians knew that patients could read what we wrote almost immediately.
Matti: I’ve definitely had moments where I had to Google half the acronyms.
Dr. Kacel: You’re not alone.
And now many people skip Google and go straight to AI.
Understanding medical information is becoming an entire field of study in itself. Access to information is wonderful, but interpretation matters too.
Fear of Recurrence, Hypervigilance, and Why Cancer Changes the Rules
Matti: One thing that really stood out to me earlier was what you said about hypervigilance. I can imagine someone who’s had cancer getting a headache and immediately wondering, Is this it? Is the cancer back? Whereas someone else might just think, I probably need more water. That seems incredibly anxiety-inducing.
Dr. Kacel: It is. The challenge is that we spend our lives teaching people to pay attention to their bodies. We tell people to notice symptoms, recognize changes, and seek medical attention when something feels wrong. Those are good messages.
But after someone experiences the trauma of cancer, that awareness can become hypervigilance. Hypervigilance is when the brain becomes intensely focused on monitoring the body for signs of danger. In many ways, it’s an attempt to protect the person—not just physically, but emotionally. For many patients, a cancer diagnosis feels completely earth-shattering. It creates a sense that the rules of life are no longer what they thought they were.
Hypervigilance is the brain’s way of saying, I don’t ever want to be blindsided again. The problem is that normal bodily sensations start getting interpreted as potential threats. A headache becomes, What if the cancer spread? A stomach ache becomes, What if it’s back? A sore muscle becomes, What if we missed something?
That’s where catastrophic thinking can start to take hold.
Matti: Which, I imagine, most of us do at least occasionally.
Dr. Kacel: Absolutely. Everyone catastrophizes sometimes. The issue isn’t having the thought. The issue is when it becomes a pattern. If every physical sensation immediately gets interpreted as evidence of something terrible, anxiety can become overwhelming very quickly.
Studying Fear of Recurrence
Matti: You mentioned earlier that fear of recurrence was actually the focus of your dissertation work. How did you end up studying that specifically?
Dr. Kacel: Part of it was personal. When I was in college, my grandfather died after his fifth cancer diagnosis. These weren’t recurrences of the same cancer. They were multiple different cancers over the course of his life.
Around that same time, I discovered the field of health psychology, which focuses on the relationship between physical health and psychological well-being. I knew almost immediately that this was what I wanted to do. At the same time, I had also become interested in yoga and mindfulness. I became a yoga instructor and started learning about how mindfulness-based approaches could help people cope with anxiety, stress, and chronic illness.
So my dissertation explored whether yoga could help reduce fear of cancer recurrence. The theory was that fear of recurrence is fundamentally future-focused. It’s about what might happen tomorrow, next year, or five years from now.
Yoga and mindfulness bring attention back to the present moment. The goal isn’t to eliminate fear entirely. It’s to reduce the degree to which those fears dominate a person’s daily life.
Do Patients Teach Their Psychologists?
Matti: Something I’ve been wondering throughout this conversation is whether the learning goes both ways. Obviously patients learn from you. But do you learn from your patients?
Dr. Kacel: Constantly. I learn from them all the time.
One woman I worked with several years ago had breast cancer. We know that maintaining a healthy lifestyle and staying active can help reduce recurrence risk, so she became deeply committed to walking every day. Recently we reconnected after several years, and she told me she was heading out for her daily walk. I wasn’t surprised at all.
She had taken the things she could control and made them her focus. Cancer creates enormous uncertainty. There are so many things people can’t control. But there are always some things they can.
I think about patients like her when I’m struggling with my own goals. Their resilience absolutely inspires me. I hesitate to say that cancer patients are “so strong,” because many patients dislike hearing that phrase. They’ll often say, I’m not strong. I’m just doing what I need to do.
And I understand that perspective. But I do learn a tremendous amount from the determination and adaptability that I see in the people I work with.
The Problem With Uncertainty
Matti: Earlier you mentioned something that really resonated with me. In therapy, one phrase I heard all the time was, “I don’t have a crystal ball.” I hated hearing it because what I really wanted was certainty. I wanted someone to tell me exactly how things were going to turn out.
Dr. Kacel: Cancer patients want that too.
People want their doctors to tell them with absolute certainty that the cancer is gone forever and they’re never going to deal with it again. The reality is that uncertainty is one of the hardest things for human beings to tolerate.
We don’t like not knowing. We don’t like uncertainty about our health, our relationships, our careers, or our futures. Cancer simply magnifies that uncertainty in a very profound way.
One of the questions patients often struggle with is: How do I make plans? If there’s a possibility that cancer could come back, how do I plan a vacation? How do I think about retirement? How do I think about the future?
One thing I encourage people to do is separate their plans into different time horizons. What am I doing this week? What am I doing this month? What am I doing six months from now? What are my long-term dreams?
When people lump everything together, planning can feel impossible. But when you break it into smaller windows, it often feels much more manageable.
Living Life Anyway
Dr. Kacel: One of my favorite examples involves an oncologist I worked with years ago. She eventually started a side business as a travel agent.
What she realized was that many of her patients had spent years dreaming about traveling. They had saved money, planned routes, researched destinations, and looked forward to these experiences. Then cancer entered the picture and suddenly they weren’t sure if those dreams were still possible.
So she began helping people figure out ways to make those trips happen. Sometimes that meant buying travel insurance. Sometimes it meant arranging mobility accommodations. Sometimes it meant using a wheelchair.
And that’s where another important conversation comes in. People often assign tremendous meaning to things like wheelchairs, walkers, canes, or hospital beds. They may see them as symbols of decline or failure.
But sometimes a wheelchair is just a wheelchair. A cane is just a cane. A hospital bed is just a bed. These are tools that can help someone continue doing the things that matter to them. Removing those negative meanings can be incredibly liberating.
Matti: And honestly, when I see someone using a walker or wheelchair, I notice it for maybe half a second and then move on with my life. I imagine we’re often much harder on ourselves than other people are.
Dr. Kacel: Absolutely. Part of it is fear of judgment from others. But often it’s also self-judgment.
People ask themselves, What does this mean about me? Am I weak? Am I losing my independence?
Those interpretations matter enormously. A core principle of cognitive behavioral therapy is that our emotional experience is heavily influenced by how we interpret events. The meaning we assign to something often matters as much as the event itself.
Life After Cancer: A New Normal
Matti: We’ve talked about fear of recurrence, follow-up care, survivorship, and all of these things that happen after treatment ends. One thing I’m curious about is whether people ever really go back to who they were before cancer.
Do most people eventually return to their old lives? Or does the experience change them permanently?
Dr. Kacel: You’re setting me up to say it depends again.
Matti: I knew it.
Dr. Kacel: There really is a range. Some people go through treatment, recover, and over time reintegrate into their lives in a way that feels very similar to before cancer. They may pay more attention to their health, but emotionally they’re doing quite well.
For many others, though, cancer becomes part of their story in a lasting way. It doesn’t necessarily dominate their life, but it changes how they view themselves, their priorities, and sometimes their bodies.
People may be dealing with scars, hair loss, physical limitations, fatigue, changes in appearance, or side effects that continue long after treatment ends. So rather than returning to their old normal, many people talk about finding a new normal.
That phrase comes up all the time in survivorship.
One area where this is especially important is sexual health and intimacy. For a long time, these conversations weren’t happening. The attitude was often, Well, you survived cancer. Isn’t that enough?
Thankfully, that’s changing.
We now recognize that people don’t just want to survive. They want to live fully. They want relationships. They want intimacy. They want joy. They want connection. Those things matter at every age, and they’re increasingly becoming part of survivorship care.
Does Time Help?
Matti: One thing I kept thinking about throughout this conversation is whether time helps.
I went through therapy for anxiety years ago, and one of the things we did was exposure therapy. The more time that passed without my feared outcome happening, the easier it became to manage the anxiety.
Is something similar true here? If someone gets clear scans year after year, does time help reduce the fear?
Dr. Kacel: I like the way you phrased that. Time helping is different from time healing.
We often hear the phrase time heals all wounds, and I don’t think that’s universally true. But I do think time and distance can be helpful factors.
For many people, as more time passes and life starts to feel more normal again, anxiety decreases. They build confidence. They accumulate experiences that aren’t centered around cancer.
But it’s important to recognize that fear of recurrence isn’t irrational.
This is one area where cancer psychology differs somewhat from traditional anxiety treatment. If someone has ovarian cancer, for example, and there is a documented recurrence risk, then worrying about recurrence isn’t a distorted thought. It’s a real possibility.
So we have to be careful not to dismiss those fears as unrealistic.
The goal isn’t necessarily to convince someone that recurrence is impossible. The goal is to help them live their life even in the presence of uncertainty.
Thoughts Are Not Facts
Dr. Kacel: This is where I often draw from Acceptance and Commitment Therapy, or ACT.
One of the central ideas is that thoughts are not facts.
If I have a headache and immediately think, The cancer has spread to my brain, that’s a thought. It doesn’t mean it’s true.
Many people unintentionally treat their thoughts as predictions. They assume that because they had a frightening thought, something terrible is about to happen.
Instead, we help people notice the thought, acknowledge it, and then redirect attention back to what’s actually happening in the present moment.
What’s true right now?
What’s happening today?
What matters to me right now?
Those questions tend to be much more helpful than endlessly debating hypothetical futures.
Another major component of ACT is values-based living.
Everyone has things that matter deeply to them. For some people it’s family. For others it’s faith, fitness, community, creativity, helping others, nature, or personal growth.
When uncertainty feels overwhelming, values can function like a compass. They help guide your decisions even when you don’t know exactly what the future holds.
What Would You Say to Someone Struggling With Fear of Recurrence?
Matti: If someone listening right now is struggling with fear of recurrence, what would you want them to know?
Dr. Kacel: First and foremost, you’re not alone.
You’re not weird.
You’re not broken.
You’re not doing something wrong.
Fear of recurrence is incredibly common. In fact, most cancer survivors experience it to some degree.
The second thing I’d want people to know is that they’re not uniquely flawed.
This comes from the work of psychologist Kristin Neff and her research on self-compassion. We often judge ourselves much more harshly than we would judge anyone else.
If you’re struggling to exercise, struggling to sleep, struggling with worry, struggling to move forward after cancer, you’re not failing. You’re having a human response to a difficult experience.
There are tools that can help.
There are books, support groups, mental health professionals, survivorship programs, and evidence-based therapies specifically designed to help people navigate these challenges.
You don’t have to figure it all out alone.
It’s Gonna Be Fine / Hope for the Future
Matti: On this show, we always like to end with a little bit of optimism. We call it the It’s Gonna Be Fine moment.
Now obviously cancer is far too complex to reduce to a simple question of whether everything will be okay. But in the context of today’s conversation, what gives you hope?
Dr. Kacel: One of my favorite moments as a psychologist is when someone looks at me and says, I finally feel like myself again.
Sometimes that’s someone who’s finished treatment and is moving forward into survivorship.
Sometimes it’s someone living with advanced cancer who may never be cancer-free.
But in both cases, they’ve reconnected with themselves. They’ve rediscovered meaning, purpose, joy, or hope despite everything they’ve been through.
There will always be things we can’t control.
There will always be uncertainty.
But there will also always be things we can control.
We can choose how we spend our time. We can choose where we place our attention. We can choose to seek support. We can choose to pursue the things that matter to us.
That’s why the name of my practice is PEAR Health Psychology: Purpose, Empowerment, Acceptance, and Resilience.
No matter where someone is in their cancer journey—or any health journey—I want them to know that those things are still possible.
Use the tools that are available to you. Lean on your support system. Work with your healthcare team. Seek mental health support if you need it.
Do what works.
And allow yourself the opportunity to feel as much like yourself as possible, no matter what you’re facing.
Matti: Dr. Elizabeth Kacel, thank you so much for joining me today. I learned a tremendous amount from this conversation, and I know our listeners will too.
Dr. Kacel: Thank you so much for having me.
Closing Dedication
Matti: My thanks again to Dr. Elizabeth Kacel for joining me today.
Before we wrap, there’s one more thing I’d like to share.
This episode is dedicated in loving memory of my dear friend, Alayna, who passed away recently after her own brief battle with cancer.
Alayna—or as she was listed in my phone, “One-Layna”—was a one-of-a-kind human being.
I met her during a major transition in my own life, and her friendship helped me come through that period stronger, happier, and more confident than I would have otherwise.
She was fiercely loyal. She taught me what it means to pursue your passions, to embrace life fully, and to live in the moment.
One of the things I’m most grateful for is that the last time I saw her, I got to see her in her element as a mom. I watched how much she adored her children, how she shared in their excitement over even the small things like unique ice cream flavors, and how naturally she brought joy wherever she went.
She lived life with a smile.
Alayna, thank you for the friendship, the laughter, and the example you set. The world won’t be the same without you.
This transcript has been edited for readability.
